The Lost Language of Oysters

Professor Dr Dr Moritz-Maria von Igelfeld is not just any professor—he is the author of the highly regarded Portuguese Irregular Verbs—a book so long and dense that it’s entirely possible no one has actually read it. His colleague Professor Dr Detlev Amadeus Unterholzer, the writer of a far less important book on the subjunctive, is jealous of von Igelfeld’s real estate down the hall at the University of Regensburg’s Institute of Romance Philology. At the same time, von Igelfeld is desperate to read a book in Unterholzer’s possession. Naturally, this simmering rivalry goes hilariously awry.

Meanwhile, the Institute is visited by two scholars from New Orleans, Professor Pom Pom Boisseau and her friend Professor Alice Martinique, who are experts in the Provençal language and avid motor bikers. Von Igelfeld is rather taken with Pom Pom. In fact, he is very taken with her. Everyone can foresee this infatuation leading to disappointment. But for von Igelfeld, disasters often arrive in twos and threes. Nonetheless, at the end of it all is the promise of a visit to Louisiana, where important research on oyster communication is underway.

“[Von Igelfeld is] a comedic jewel.”—The New York Times Review of Books