Stranger With A Spoon

What happens when the person you love is still here – but no longer themselves?

When dementia changes memory, identity and behaviour, caring can become far more than anyone ever imagined. It is not only forgetfulness or repetition. It can be fear, paranoia, wandering, agitation, aggression, sleepless nights, personality changes, confusion and sudden crises that leave families overwhelmed and alone. These behavioural and psychological symptoms of dementia (BPSD) are often lived privately, hidden behind closed doors, and rarely spoken about honestly.

And when they arrive, someone else is often left carrying the invisible weight of it all. A wife who no longer sleeps properly. Grieving a partner still alive. Making impossible decisions on someone else's behalf. All over Australia, families are quietly unravelling while trying to appear fine to the outside world.

This moving collection of short stories gives voice to the carers. Inspired by real conversations with people supporting loved ones through dementia, particularly those experiencing BPSD, these fictionalised stories reveal the emotional world of carers whose lives have been reshaped by behaviours they never expected to navigate. Each story is rooted in lived experience, drawn from moments shared by carers during interviews and workshops. Names and identifying details have been changed, but the emotional truth remains.

Told with compassion, honesty and literary warmth, these stories explore the landscape rarely captured in medical language or public conversation: living grief, guilt, shame, loyalty, resentment, humour, devotion and the quiet courage required to keep going when love for someone transitions to care.

Whether you are living this journey now, have walked it before, or simply want to better understand the hidden lives of others, this collection offers something precious: recognition.

Because behind every person fading, there is often someone holding on.